The Night Before Christmas – 2018 Edition

By Grant T. Smith

With apologies to Clement Clark Moore, whose work I adore.

 

christmas‘Twas many days before Christmas, when all through the House

Senior ministers were snoozing, more than one perhaps soused.

Morneau brought an update that the cupboard was bare,

No one should expect for St. Nick to appear.

The taxpayers were waiting to hear what to dread,

While visions of depreciation danced in their heads.

And Notley in her oilfield, and Horgan in a flap,

Had both just reached out with their provincial cap.

 

When out on the streets there was ne’er a clatter,

I reached for my Surface to see what was the matter.

Away to my Windows – on the keyboard so fast,

Typed open and password, and then was aghast.

The mail it had ceased in my mailbox to grow,

And my spirits were starting to sink very low.

When the government determined the mail should appear,

And voted an end, as the posties did fear.

 

A G20 was called – off they flew in a blink,

Inviting too many for comfort I think.

Politicians on their jets – they flew and they came,

And now I will call them, will call them by name:

Now Conte! Now Jinping! Now Macron! Now Merkel!

On Nieto! On Putin! On Trump and on Trudeau!

Over top of the US! Over top of Trump’s wall,

Please dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!

 

Back in BC we wondered and pondered our fate,

As the postal strike affected our referendum date.

Will we pass by a post or proportionally rate,

Politicians who beg for our votes through debate?

 

Oh, enough of my fuss and deplorable prose,

There must be a way to bring this to a close!

Go away Grant, just go and depart from my site,

With Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!